Last night I started writing about how last year, around this time, I took this trip away from the ordinary for 24 hours and how amazing it was. I decided to change the subject today and talk about something else: love.
What is love anyways? I never understood love. I was watching this documentary about love and how we need to love ourselves and let the love of God guide us on what love is. I have followed these women talk about love and although many of them seemed happy, some of them were quite disappointed I could say. Many of them were at the age where they did not have children although they wish they had some and it was quite possibly too late for them to even conceive. Many of them did not want to have children but they wanted to have that special someone to be around them when they are home for the lonely days. Many of the women that were showcased in the documentary were professionals and they were very successful. I guess in order for a woman to be successful she must sacrifice the family that she always dreamed of. It is a sad reality that as women we have to sacrifice so much to become someone. One thing that gets me regarding my life is when people, especially other women, judge women for the decisions that they make. From my studies I have learned that in the past women have gone through so much to be where they are today and still, we have to sacrifice and accept things or better yet, challenge things from our own lives to become who we we are intended to be.
I have made my decision earlier in life to have children and I have two beautiful and smart daughters that I am very proud of. It is very tough to be the sole parent to them and the only support that I get is my mother and my sister. I sometimes fear that someday, when they will all be grown up, my daughters will not have the tools and the knowledge to be who they are meant to be. I do the best that I know. I do the best that I can. I do MY best. I love my daughters unconditionally and I take my role as a parent serious.
As far as career goes, I am on my way to the top and although it is hard to do it in my situation I don't look at it as impossible. I look at it as challenging. And I love a good challenge, I mean after all these years I am a pro at challenges. There are many new things I am going to take on this year like following my dreams and take the necessary steps in doing so. YES! I am excited!
When it comes to relationship with that significant other...it has got to wait until that "other" will be the one to enhance my dreams and support my challenges. Being single is giving me the power to think and to move forward without having to wait for someone to be at the same level that I am. I am not saying I am closing my door but instead I am focusing on what is important. When that significant other will show up the door is unlocked. I am happy with myself, by myself. I am happy that I get to have my health and my motivation to move forward. I am happy that I am happy o.O
In conclusion, I am looking forward to the new year and what it has to offer. I am looking forward to overcoming my challenges and to be spending the time with my children. I am looking forward to spending time with my family and my friends. i am looking forward to making new friends and new relationships with people that will be meaningful. Life is beautiful and I am happy to be in it!